' Shattered Memories '
by Thaddeus Hutyra

 

Holding my mobile phone in my hand
hesitating yet whether to send a message
to the one I love, the one who left me
with no goodbye, no a word of farewell

Never though forgotten, a princess
of plentiful memories, my treasures
being violently taken away from me
as if an eagle flew suddenly down
seemingly from nowhere
but really from the azure blue sky
an my memories were simply no more
brought away in the claws of the eagle

And it was not just once
Anytime I thought of you
my dreams shattered
broken to thousand and one pieces
as if a mirror I stood before
suddenly collapsed
from a bullet piercing it
shattering itself onto the floor
me, seeing myself at the same time
being cut to as many pieces
blood everywhere on the broken glass
the mirror no longer, a perfect murder

I looked into those pieces
trying to find you
get you out of that glassy abyss
take you back into my arms
and love you
the way as it used to be
but what I saw was no trace of you
no trace of your soul either
and only pieces of me
so much not the same
I used to be myself

Damned, thrown away
into the devils' embrace
Unable to free myself of eternal fire
seeing nothing else
but those eye-sockets
with no eyes in them
and nothing but deadly black abyss
lots of shadows of blackness in them
Feeling falling and falling down within them
the realization this must be
like falling down
not only into the abyss
but into the hell itself

And what for? For love, just love ?
Oh, irony of ironies, what a bullshitt !!
No, I wan't back down !
Love is love and must be just love
whether anybody likes it or not
It's nothing about to be or not to be
it's just love, godlike love
damnit, devils !!

Yet my memories are of that shattered mirror
one shattered to the thousand and one pieces
and of that eagle's claws taking away
what I kept dear in my heart
of those nightly nightmares
trying to erase you from my memories
even worse, to wipe you out of my memories
Nothing but the mirror pieces on the floor
shattered all over the apartment
and me on my knees trying
to put it all together
in order to bring us back to life
both you and me, and our memories

My efforts are nearly successful
the mirror pieces are back in their places
the mirror lying now completed on the floor
but what I see
are the images far from being perfect
far from even as we remembered ourselves
both terribly wounded
blood squirting out of our bodies
I just cover my face with my hands
and run to the window
What I see is another blow
to my very self and my very soul
you and me, our memories
being swept away
by the powerful evening wind
and scattered on the nearby fields
among grazing cattle and bright butterflies

This is, my dear soulmates
how my days are ending
of the memories being swept away from me
with every passing day
no chance to have her back
even if I stopped the Earth
and moved the Sun around Earth
Goodbye my love, goodbye
I better give you up
for I can't anymore
to demise myself with that pain
of the lost love you are
Goodbye, my love, goodbye !!

This was the last message I sent to her
from my mobile phone
and only echoes follow the echoes in the air
Goodbye my love, goodbye ...
goodbye my love, goodbye ...

 

' Shattered Memories ' by Thaddeus Hutyra
Copyright © Thaddeus Hutyra
All Rights Reserved.

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